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Cake Boss
Cakeboss
Number of Appearances 21
Played by Paul F. Tompkins
First Episode Is Dave Foley Here?
Latest Episode The 8th Anniversary Show!


Cake Boss ("Cake Boss!"), real name Buddy Valastro, is a character played by Paul F. Tompkins. He is known for his TLC show Cake Boss, though he doesn't bake so many cakes. He has also appeared on the Comedy Bang! Bang! TV show.

His archenemy is the Pie Minister.

Supernatural PowersEdit

After being bitten by a cake bug in the cake kitchen, Cake Boss was given the gift/curse of the second sight, which allows him to see into the future. 

While making a pyramid cake for Donald Sterling, Cake Boss was bitten by a cake scarab, which gave him the ability to communicate with the dead (this includes fictional characters who have died, either in canonical works or in fan fiction, or those characters for whom enough time has passed that we can safely assume they have died, e.g., Huck Finn).

Cake Boss was also bitten by a cake wolf, which causes him to transform into a cake wolf whenever there is a full moon.

He has also been bitten by a cake zombie, which turned him into a cake zombie.

During his possession by the ghost of the late narco-sculptor H.R. Giger, it is revealed that Cake Boss is the ultimate source of goodness and light in the realm of the living, thus making him Giger's complete antithesis and the only vessel capable of hosting his soul.

Supernatural CakesEdit

He once baked an R2-D2 cake that gained sentience. The same thing happened with a Ball Droid cake (349: The 6th Anniversary Show!). 

He also baked a 1/3-scale replica of the Space Needle that attracted extraterrestrials.

Catchphrases (Cakephrases)Edit

  • Cake Boss repeats "Cake Boss!" every time anyone mentions his name. It is possible he himself is unaware of this vocal tic. During his possession by the late narco-sculptor H.R. Giger, Cake Boss's compulsion to comply with this tic was so powerful that it was able to temporarily weaken Giger's control over him.  
  • He speaks in a strong New Jersey accent, and often has trouble pronouncing words (e.g. androidge for androids, Auxerman for Aukerman).
  • Cake Boss is known to yell stereotypical Italian exclamations when he is frustrated (e.g. "Pasta Fazool", "Oh, Madon"). Over time these exclamations have become more corrupted, and now are little more than gibberish with an Italian accent (e.g. "Ajabagoo").

AppearancesEdit

List of Appearances
Episode Release Date Other Characters Guests
485: The 8th Anniversary Show! 5.1.17 Gino Lambardo, Garry Marshall, Alan Thicke, Regina Crimp, P'Nut, Bone Queef, The Chief, Chucky Spliff, John Lennon, Dagmar the Small, Burt & Rauro Riley, Norm Hamer, Ming, Keith Jones, R. Schrift Jon Gabrus, Lauren Lapkus, Zeke Nicholson, Carl Tart, Mary Holland, Mike Hanford, Jessica McKenna, Tawny Newsome, Tim Baltz, Ryan Gaul, Jeremy Rowley, Drew Tarver, Nick Kroll
2016 Tour, Manchester 9.25.16 Gino Lambardo, John Lennon Jon Gabrus, Mike Hanford
2016 Tour, Brisbane 8.25.16 Todd, Little Bump Lauren Lapkus, Mike Hanford
2016 Tour, Detroit 5.21.16 Dinky Liddle, Raymond Flapper Lauren Lapkus, Mike Hanford
2016 Tour, Toronto Pt. 1 5.5.16 Mizz Chips, Nathan Hershey Lauren Lapkus, Tim Baltz
349: The 6th Anniversary Show! 5.4.15 Santa, Alan Thicke, Ho Ho the Elf, Klaus Schneider, The Time Keeper, John Lennon, Rickster, Chad Warren, Brad Hammerstone Lauren Lapkus, Thomas Middleditch, Neil Campbell, Mike Hanford, Paul Scheer, Erin Whitehead, Joe Wengert
303: Puttering Around 8.4.14 Andrew Lloyd Webber Loudon Wainwright III
289: The Exorcism of Cake Boss 5.26.14

H.R. Giger, Reverend Robert Parsimony

Matt Gourley
2013 Tour, New York Pt. 1  10.12.13 B.J. Novak
2013 Tour, Los Angeles 9.28.13 Don DiMello Andy Daly
221: The Cake Council 5.27.13 Andy Richter
208: Zombie Candles 3.18.13 Steven Yeun, Doug Benson
2012 Tour, San Francisco 8.3.12 Huell Howser Kurt Braunohler, James Adomian
169: Immortal Mustache 7.30.12 Jay Chandrasekhar
156: Anniversary Party! 4.30.12 Christopher HitchensMarissa WomplerEl ChupacabraToph Shay St. VincentZach GalifianakisHarris Wittels, Brett GelmanJames AdomianJessica St. Clair,  Nick Kroll
135: Scavenge and the Wiseman 12.12.11 Dan Telfer, Erinn Hayes
Bumbershoot 2011, Day 3 9.5.11 Don DiMello Doug Benson, Andy Daly
106: It's a Fucking Podcast: Pt 2 5.30.11 Andy Richter
106: It's a Fucking Podcast: Pt 1 5.23.11 Andy Richter
85: That's One Way of Doing It 12.20.10 Don DiMello, El ChupacabraBob Ducca Colin Hanks, Brett GelmanNeil CampbellAndy DalyNick KrollSeth Morris
67: What Happens in Vegas 8.19.10 Rob Corddry, Lake Bell
56: Is Dave Foley Here? 6.4.10 David Anthony Higgins

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