|Release date||November 28, 2011|
|Hosted by||Scott Aukerman|
|Guests|| Patton Oswalt|
|Occupy Thanksgiving||Bride of Chucky|
Patton Oswalt is back in the Comedy Bang Bang hot seat! Fortunately, he has a new movie coming out and he’s ready to give us all sorts of exclusive information. Unfortunately, we still have our open door policy and a gentleman named Leslie Schecter finds his way into the studio. Fortunately, Patton was still game for Would You Rather? and Fortunately Unfortunately despite this rude interruption. Unfortunately, Leslie hangs around for the rest of the episode. Fortunately, you can forget all about his rudeness and relive your favorite Comedy Bang Bang moments by heading to the Earwolf blog and voting for the CBB Best of 2011.
Scott and Patton Oswalt discuss Thanksgiving, the comedy "industry," small towns chasing artists to New York and L.A., the double meaning of the title Young Adult, love scenes in barns, and working with Charlize Theron. They are interrupted by Leslie Schecter, substitute Spanish teacher from Las Calabras High School and winner of a charity auction studio visit. Leslie ("el tigre") tells about his school, "Jug Fuck Thursday," and wrist sex. It turns out he's actually an "amateur" teacher who has spent time in Mexico running a child-fighting ring. The kids call him "Mr. Stop-It."
Leslie tries to get Patton and Scott to hang out with him. He reveals that he stole the money that was donated and shares more details about his child-fighting ring and his trouble meeting women. He brainwashes Scott and starts calling him "el tigrito," and they force Patton to try to blow himself. When he comes out of it, Patton hypnotizes him to plug Young Adult.
Scott and Patton realize that every time Patton comes on the show for an in-depth interview they are interrupted. Leslie's creepy looks are described, and he talks about a time he delivered a baby in a cab and then took the new mother out to dinner (against her will). He keeps bringing up the movie Hard Target and they all discuss the various Wilford Brimleys (Cajun Wilford Brimley, Italian Wilford Brimley, etc.).
Scott begins the game "Fortunately Unfortunately," and they get sidetracked onto the movie Antz. They try to play again but Scott starts feeling brainwashed and sick and the game ends abruptly.
Would you rather eat an entire Christmas tree OR have all of your children have Jim Carrey's face from The Grinch tattooed on their chests?
In the first scenario, the Christmas tree is Rockefeller Center size but made of chocolate (which sends Scott into his "el tigrito" trance), prepared by either Chef Bourdain or Chef Boyardee.
In the second scenario, the tattoo is a DIY prison tattoo put on according to prison rules, but the prison is a prison for millionaire tattoo artists so it's very well done. They aren't necessarily your children, they are any children that are within 50 yards of you. (But this doesn't include Steve Agee.)
Patton (or Pato-juane) votes for the first scenario but only as a ruse for the second scenario (approach the tree to eat it but only to lure the children to get tattooed). Leslie votes for the first scenario but wants to see Steve Agee tattooed a la the second scenario. Patton is declared the winner.
Scott promises the audience he will eventually get to every "Would You Rather?" scenario that is submitted.